Saturday, June 09, 2012
9:39 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: So what was it you wanted earlier?
9:39 AM - bl5w: can yu gift me a game
9:40 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Ah, a friend must have sent you. You know, I'm usually a very generous man, but I've been extremely depressed lately.
9:40 AM - bl5w: yea
9:40 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I'd be glad to give you at least ten games if you can help me through this.
9:40 AM - bl5w: so please
9:40 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Alright, but ya gotta help me first. So, where do I start?
9:40 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Ah, right.
9:41 AM - bl5w: ok
9:41 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: My mother told me last week that I was gonna have a younger brother.
9:41 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Thing is, she's 70, and my dad is paralyzed.
9:41 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: So she's sleeping around.
9:41 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I need to find out with whom.
9:41 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: How do you suggest I find out who my mother is sleeping with?
9:42 AM - bl5w: your brother
9:42 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Well, my brother hasn't been born yet!
9:42 AM - bl5w: uncle
9:42 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I don't have any uncles.
9:43 AM - bl5w: dad
9:43 AM - bl5w: dad
9:43 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Definitely not! She's cheating on him, I can't tell him!
9:44 AM - bl5w: a friend
9:44 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: None of my friends are even close to my mother's age. How would they know?
9:44 AM - bl5w: grandpa
9:45 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: My grandpa's dead.
9:45 AM - bl5w: uumm your older brother
9:45 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I don't have one.
9:45 AM - bl5w: your cousin
9:46 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I don't have one.
9:46 AM - bl5w: your nephew
9:46 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I don't have one.
9:46 AM - bl5w: your stepfather
9:46 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I don't have one.
9:46 AM - bl5w: ok i dont know
9:47 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Well, I suppose I can give these games to someone else, then.
9:47 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Thanks for trying. I appreciate it.
9:47 AM - bl5w: wait
9:47 AM - bl5w: i want them
9:47 AM - bl5w: please
9:47 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Well, I do have other problems you might be able to fix.
9:48 AM - bl5w: ill do whatever yu want
9:48 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Lately, myself and my mother have been fucking, but my performance isn't as great as it could be, apparently.
9:48 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I need tips.
9:48 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: How do I do better in bed?
9:49 AM - bl5w: fuck harrder
9:49 AM - bl5w: hey dave how much money do you have?
9:50 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I have $32,458,971.06 in my bank account as of five minutes ago.
9:50 AM - bl5w: hey dave how much money do you have?
9:50 AM - bl5w: wow dude can yu gift me a game
9:50 AM - bl5w: please
9:51 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: If you solve my problems, yes.
9:51 AM - bl5w: any
9:51 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Fucking harder just won't cut it.
9:51 AM - bl5w: game
9:51 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I need more advice.
9:51 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: How do I do better in bed?
9:51 AM - bl5w: any game
9:51 AM - bl5w: dude
9:51 AM - bl5w: really?
9:51 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I have to know, my mother needs to be pleased.
9:51 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Really.
9:53 AM - bl5w: BE A ROCKKER
9:53 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: What do you mean?
9:53 AM - bl5w: buy her stufff
9:53 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Pfft, I already made her love me. I need bedroom advice!
9:53 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: How do I fuck better?
9:54 AM - bl5w: train your pc muscles
9:54 AM - bl5w: dude
9:54 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: pc muscles?
9:54 AM - bl5w: yea do exercise
9:55 AM - bl5w: and then yu can fuck her harder
9:55 AM - bl5w: really
9:55 AM - bl5w: more muscles
9:55 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Oh wow, I never thought of that! Thanks!
9:55 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I need more advice though.
9:56 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: My dad is paralyzed and I have to kill him.
9:56 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: How do I not get caught?
9:57 AM - bl5w: yu have to hit him with a car
9:57 AM - bl5w: so fast
9:57 AM - bl5w: yu have to chock him whens hes a sleep
9:58 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: But then my fingerprints are left on his corpse.
9:58 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Or his blood gets all over my armored car.
9:58 AM - bl5w: but some special gloves
9:59 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I own all the special gloves ever already.
9:59 AM - bl5w: shoot him with a sniper rifle
9:59 AM - bl5w: or tell a friend to kill him
9:59 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: But they won't work. My hands are just too big.
9:59 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I don't have any friends, actually.
9:59 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: And I'm terrible at sniping.
9:59 AM - bl5w: thenn train
9:59 AM - bl5w: train
9:59 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I tried sniping the president once and ended up killing some random nigger instead.
9:59 AM - bl5w: so
10:00 AM - bl5w: ?
10:00 AM - bl5w: ?
10:00 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I think it was his son.
10:00 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Either way! I can't have any guns because of that.
10:01 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: So how do I kill him without getting caught?
10:02 AM - bl5w: ohh yu cut his head with a knife
10:02 AM - bl5w: or yu put poison on his drinkes
10:03 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Ohh, that's a good idea. I like that.
10:03 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Poison.
10:03 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Genius!
10:03 AM - bl5w: can yu
10:03 AM - bl5w: give me 1 game
10:03 AM - bl5w: please
10:03 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Alright, alright. This is the last problem I'll need you to fix, I swear!
10:04 AM - bl5w: ok
10:05 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I'm terribly deformed. I have four arms, a tail, three eyes, and two penises. How do I go back to normal?
10:06 AM - bl5w: sry
10:06 AM - bl5w: dude
10:06 AM - bl5w: what did
10:06 AM - bl5w: yu put
10:06 AM - bl5w: my dad
10:06 AM - bl5w: was here
10:06 AM - bl5w: so
10:06 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Oh, you closed out of the chat
10:06 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: That's fine, I'll re-type it.
10:07 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I'm terribly deformed. I have four arms, a tail, three eyes, and two penises. On top of that, my skin is like leather. How do I go back to normal?
10:10 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Hello?
10:12 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Are you there? I need your help.
10:14 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Well alright then. If you're gone, I'll find someone else to give games to
10:40 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Ah, what the hell. I feel bad for you. You've done so much for me and I'm not even being grateful. Here, go to my stock manager, Lord Killington.
10:40 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: He can set you up with my inventory of games.
10:40 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: You'll be given $750 worth by my command. Just prove it to him, mkai?
10:40 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly:
http://steamcommunity.com/id/lordkillington/
10:42 AM - bl5w: SRY
10:42 AM - bl5w: DUDE
10:43 AM - bl5w: WHAT AS THE QUESTION
10:43 AM - bl5w: SRY
10:43 AM - bl5w: SRY
10:43 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Oh, that's no problem.
10:43 AM - bl5w: so?
10:43 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Just go to my stock manager, Lord Killington. He'll set you up.
http://steamcommunity.com/id/lordkillington/
10:43 AM - bl5w: dude?
10:44 AM - bl5w: how about the game
10:44 AM - bl5w: games
10:44 AM - bl5w: dude
10:44 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I have all of my deliveries and trades run through him, as I am a busy man.
10:44 AM - bl5w: what happend
10:44 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Go to him for your games.
10:44 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I've ordered him to give you $750 worth in games from my personal stock.
10:45 AM - bl5w: cool
10:45 AM - bl5w: awsome
10:46 AM - bl5w: he wont add me
10:46 AM - bl5w: dude
10:46 AM - bl5w: tell ihm
10:46 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I've notified him. He will contact you within due time, so please be patient.
10:46 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I have nothing more I can say. Enjoy your games, friend.
10:47 AM - bl5w: ok
10:47 AM - bl5w: wait
10:47 AM - bl5w: tell me his adress
10:47 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Yes?
10:47 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Address?
10:47 AM - bl5w: the link
10:47 AM - bl5w: the link
10:47 AM - bl5w: to add him
10:47 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Ah, right. I posted that already, see.
10:47 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly:
http://steamcommunity.com/id/lordkillington/
10:47 AM - bl5w: ok
10:47 AM - bl5w: i add him
10:48 AM - bl5w: but really
10:48 AM - bl5w: 750
10:48 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: It's the least I can do.
10:48 AM - bl5w: buck yu sware of god really?
10:48 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: I swear.
10:48 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: You take care now. A client is trying to contact me, and I need to make some room on my friends list.
10:48 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Surely you can understand.
10:49 AM - >DOM< Dave the Manly: Lord Killington will take it from here. Enjoy yourself, good sir.
bl5w is now Offline.