I asked my North Korean friend how it is over there. He said he can't complain
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When life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic
Deep thought: when you empty out a vacuum cleaner, you become a vacuum cleaner
Sleeping with the bartender won't get you a free drink. But it is worth a shot
i just discovered these https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9C_HReR_McQ
I, for one, like Roman Numerals
Dooo a AMA ploooz.
Donald Trump is still running for president because it is the only race he hasn't offended yet.
Ur butt will echo once im through with u winkwink
Rate 1-10
Last one because it's all i have for today: My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in.
:P
If you were a booger I'd pick you first.
Hey, you, me, baboom huh?
On a scale of 1 to 10, you’re a 9. I’m the 1 you need.
I like Legos, you like Legos, why don't we build a relationship?
I thought getting a vasectomy would keep my wife from getting pregnant but all it does is change the color of the baby
Can you get on tf2 someday so i can play with/against you before i die?
What did the big rose say to the little rose? "Hey bud"
And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
If the next president is white, that means the entire country went black and successfully went back -
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